So much for the afterglow

So these last 2 years have been quite a roller coaster for me and employment. I was let go from my last job for attendance reason, which is a whole 'nother story. After 5 months of being unemployed, I was hired for a new job. After months of training under full time hours, my on call schedule started which means crap for hours and lots of uncertainty. Now it looks like I'm going to get fired from this job too. It's no guarantee yet but, if what one of the union girls said that I'm being accused of is accurate, it's a fireable offense. For something I should know better than to do, accessing a co worker's chart! I don't remember doing it, but one of my co workers told my manager that I did it. So we'll see. The hub and I have talked, and he agreed that if I do get let go, we'd do ok financially if I don't look for other work. I really miss being able to focus on doing work with races; it's something I enjoy and I'm pretty darn good at. Plus, there's a chance that at some point, it could turn into a job for me. I'm just frustrated that I keep screwing up and losing jobs ... I usually have a good work ethic.

For some positive news, the hub finally got a job offer that is with a company that recognizes his potential. He's bouncing back and forth between being super excited at a new job, anxious he's going to screw it up, and guilty for leaving his old company. It's been a roller coaster, and will probably continue to be so until he gets settled into his new job. He'll do well at it!

Adding to my things of "don't freak out, but ... " things is that it's been a year of not using any form of birth control and I'm not pregnant. We've started seeing a infertility doctor and the good/bad thing is all the lab results that have come back so far have been not bad enough to explain the lack of pregnancy, but "just a little bit off". They performed a ultrasound of my uterus which came back with a abnormality that wouldn't affect my ability to get pregnant, but will increase my chances of "pre-term labor" (miscarriages) by a lot. I was telling my mom about it and she mentioned offhandedly that she has the same thing and that it's genetic. I wanted to scream and laugh and cry all at the same time. She said "I've always told you guys that if you ask me a question, I will answer it. You never asked me so I never told". Why would I think to ask that question? I didn't even know it was a thing!

So, needless to say, this morning has started out rough for me. Lets hope it gets better!